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07/21/2008: "The line"
(I need to start out this quick entry by noting that Dessa has been in her crib for the last hour and I don't think she's shut up for more than two minutes straight. She is, to put it delicately, avoiding her nap.)
I know there are parents out there who disdain all character based toys, clothing or other accessories. I'm not especially one of them, loving Disney as I do and having a particularly warm spot in my heart for Sesame Street. But I do understand their point - there are a lot of companies trying to make a buck off your kid in whatever ways they can. They're not concerned about the messages they're sending and they're not staying awake at night worried about whether their offerings are turning kids into vapid little consumers.
But as with anything, there is a line to be drawn. I was raised to be skeptical of extremes. To claim that all character based toys are bad is just as goofy to me as saying none of them are. It depends on the message, the meaning and the timing. And the decisions about those elements are the job of the parents. Abdicating that responsibility by painting a broad brush stroke over every character-based item seems lazy.
I do and will continue to avoid some of the Big Nasties. If your kid loves them, more power to them, and you, but I have issues with them. For example, I'm not a huge fan of Barbie. Should Dessa come to love that particular franchise, I'll re-evaluate, but she'll have to come to it on her own. I don't intend to encourage it. There are the body issues, and the materialistic bent that old Barbie has, and a host of other quandaries that she raises for me. So if I can avoid her, I shall.
The entire Bratz franchise is verboten. Period. Those big-headed freaks just scream "junior high ho" to me. Why does a child require a doll dressed like a prostitute? Answer: she doesn't. There's enough out there to do battle with; a skanky doll I don't need. A skanky doll that idolizes boys and focuses so much energy on the state of her hairdo? Blech.
'Course, by the time Dess is the target age, I suspect the Bratz will have been supplanted with something else. One can hope it won't be even worse (though the rival "Flava" toy faction, with it's dolls in ripped jeans, leopard print tops and accessory graffiti wall makes me physically ill).
Fortunately my own private war on fashion dolls is some years away. These days, deciding what to let Dessa see and play with is pretty easy. I'm not a fan of any cartoon franchise whose sole aim is to sell toys. I don't know anyone who provides toys for Dessa who is. If the cartoon came first and was established and then there were toys? Not such an issue for me. And there are about a million marvelous educational toys out there that focus on the Right Stuff (counting, alphabet, vocabulary and the like). Plus Dessa doesn't watch a ton of TV and what she does see I watch with her. It's fun to sing along and count with the Count and find other things in the room that are red. We clap when Eve the squirrel finds the hidden acorn (on the aptly titled "Find the Acorn" on BabyFirst TV) and I follow up on Harry the Bunny's lesson regarding "behind" and "in front of" by showing Dessa the same concept (again, Harry's on BabyFirst - it's a subscription channel, no commercials, and the programming is either original or from other countries and dubbed, so no merchandise. We like it at our house.)
Of course, there are the classics.
I know Elmo has been merchandised to death. I just... don't have so much of a problem with him. I think he's pretty cute, for a furry monster (I'm still a die-hard devotee of Cookie Monster, myself, but I can see the appeal). His little 15 minutes on Sesame Street are sweet and educational and fun. And Dessa, as I've mentioned,
loves him. She has a few Elmo outfits and two talking Elmo toys and several Elmo books and, yes, we have an Elmo flag flying on the front of the house from her birthday because I like to see my girl light up and point to it when we pull in the driveway.
I hope that we can stay open about consumerism, my daughter and her Dad and I. I hope I'll be able to explain why I find certain toys inappropriate and I hope more that Dessa will, if not agree with me, at least understand that I'm trying to do my best by her.
But more than that I hope that she'll keep showing her own good taste. Because I've gotten sort of fond of that little red monster myself.
Notes from a Yarn Hacker
